Sunday, July 29, 2012

Bread for the Journey


The DRESS!
We are having a wedding in our family this summer,
 and so I pulled out my Mother's wedding dress, which was carefully sewn by her mother.
This summer it takes precedence as it hangs in our  hallway.
It is not only a daily reminder, that we are having a wedding...but much more than that.
A few years back, while I was on a cleaning binge, I discovered the dress.
I called my sister to see if she would like to keep the dress.
The decision was made to give it to Good Will.
When suddenly, she blurted out,
 "No we can't get rid of this dress. This dress means COMMITMENT!"
We knew our mother worked hard, stayed loyal, and committed,
knowing that her life was not without challenges.

Remember your wedding, with all it's festivities, showers, parties, preparations...
the wedding itself, just the two of you...the honeymoon?

Today's media has rediscovered  the word 'commitment' as an optional plan.
'Happily ever after' has been transformed into, "Make me happy or I'll find some who will."
Excuses for today's world which seem to be prominently acceptable.
  • "I couldn't breathe, so I had to come up for air"
  • "I don't want to be tied down"
  •  "We are two people going in two different directions."
  • "Why go through this hell?"
  • "I never was truly in love."
  • "Divorce is the norm..."

What is real COMMITMENT?
God has committed himself to us regardless of how we perform.
God wasn't attracted to you and didn't choose you because you were big and important—the fact is, there was almost nothing to you. He did it out of sheer love.
A good marriage is not something you find, it's something that you work for.
It takes struggle.  Let go of your selfishness.
At times you need to confront and at other times confess.
The practice of forgiveness is essential.
Let's honor the call to holiness rather than to happiness.
We all know that Christian marriages will be struck by lightening...
sexual temptation, communication breakdowns, frustrations and unrealized expectations.
Water your marriage with an unwavering commitment to please God above everything else.
Think about the analogy of Christ and his church.

"Know therefore that the Lord your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant
of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commandments."
Deuteronomy 7:9
'Keep the Dress'... revisit your vows, and say "I do" every day.


20 comments:

  1. A beautiful dress! And a beautiful post!
    Sylvia

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    1. Marg! You have shared some tough Biblically sound truth here. May God protect our marriages and our hearts and minds as we live out our marriages with commitment.

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  3. This morning my husband asked me if we could get married again. I said yes, soon, on our 25th anniversary. Nothing is better than being married to a good man. It's so sad that people are missing out on the marriage, while having the weddings.

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  4. next year is our 25th... there are many people who lost bets on us out there. We made it despite the negativity on our marriage. We renewed our vows at 20 years. It is has been a rough go on our marriage, but divorse was not an option for us. We took our commitment very seriously. It is only because God helped us survive it though. Now to end this comment... this is for our situation only...others have different stories and we all have to walk in our own shoes.

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  5. How true, Marg - so much time is taken to plan the perfect wedding but little or no time is invested in preparing for marriage and commitment. Marriage is not for the faint of heart - it takes work - even after 40 years of a marriage- with lots of ups and downs, my husband and I still have to make the choice to work at that commitment. And, boy is it worth it to have that unconditional love and friendship every day. Like Marg said, God never gives up on us -

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  6. Thank you, Marg ! Commitment in marriage is sooo important, and faith in God!
    After 47 years being married to my 'only' husband I say a big AMEN to your post !

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  7. So timely. And so true! We are celebrating our 41st anniversary this week. Like Bev said...we have that unconditional love and friendship because we are committed...for the long haul...come what may!

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  8. It sure is a lovely dress,
    cheers from New Zealand, Marie

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  9. Such a beautiful dress and powerful symbol of committment!! I'm so glad you decided to keep your mom's dress, lovingly made by your grandmother, and that you are displaying it now as you prepare for your own daughter's wedding. God continue to bless you and your marriage!

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  10. We all have different challenges, true. The desire to honour God in all we do helps direct our decisions. It is truly important to love and support those who are broken and cannot see their path in this, and other paths in their life. Please go easy and choose to love those who feel heartsick and without a way to remain. It takes a lot of growth to sit alone by a campfire on your anniversary evening, have your own private time reviewing your committment and seeking to give more regardless, seeking to change your habits, attitudes and efforts further in hopes to create Peace and Life in a marriage quite wanting. To be willing to ask yourself, what can I give and how shall I love anew? In any shared life full of regret, isolation, abandonment or violence may God bring help to the hurting and heal their spirit and give strength. May He grant any who struggle a dear friend to help them through such difficult choices - whether the choice made is how we think it should be.

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    1. I welcome your comments...I struggled writing this post...because I was thinking exactly what you referred to...I have my own family members sharing the same stories...where somehow the dress did not symbolize the 'forever vow' and I hurt and ache for them...and yet I want to give hope to those stepping into new relationships, that they continue on and I so agree with you that we need to journey and walk alongside those who's marriages have failed and still give them hope...that's exactly what I did this afternoon. Your thoughts were so perfectly timed.

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  11. I'm so thankful for a committed husband of 36 years. Commitment though the death of a child, career moves and health issues. Only with God can that kind of commitment become a reality. This was a lovely and challenging post. I'm happy you kept the gown!

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  12. I'm so happy that you kept the wedding gown--it is so precious & priceless!!! We really have to commit--but I feel compromise is very important in any relationship. Thank you again for a great message!!

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  13. Beautiful post. We have been married 58 years, certainly not without difficulty and heartache but we were both willing to work through our problems and are committed until death do us part. I can't imagine ever being married to anyone else.

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  14. That was timely, Marg, for so many reasons. After nearly 39 years The Great Dane and I know the secret - it's commitment!...through thick and thin, sickness and health, fat times and lean times...but I know that we are not alone in our marriage and can't take credit for the gift of commitment. It's God's gift to us, making us three in this relationship.

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  15. WOW! Powerful and timely. Thank you for such an intimate and beautiful encouragement. Kim

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  16. AMEN Marg!!!! Oh Relationships! Whether it's with God, spouse or friend, there are always choices, but one directive...to love. And not the way the world loves, but to love as God loves (1 John 4:19). After all, what is the greatest commandment of all? "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, mind, soul and strength and your neighbor as yourself..." (Matthew 27:34-40). They will know we are christians by our love (not by our divorces, affairs, abuse and self seeking ways). My God, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac and the God of Jacob says that anything is possible, even reconciliation and restoration of horrible marriages and messed up lives. God doesn't ever say it is easy, He says anything is possible! (matthew 19:26). God keeps his promises and covenants, He is our example. Maybe we should keep our covenants too?

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  17. Thank you for this. Marriage really is a great analogy of our relationship with God, the way He designed it to be!

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